“Friends eventually forgive and come back together because people need people more than they need pride.” Hugh Prather said that and I believe it to be true.
I have realized this in my own life. I have allowed my pride to keep me from people who were very important to me. Eventually, I realized my pride (ego) needed to sit in the back seat and my heart needed to take the wheel.
Relationships are messy business. Sometimes we make mistakes. Sometimes our friends or loved ones make mistakes. Sometimes we get wrapped up in the choices and business of our friends and loved ones. We think we know for certain all the ways they’re doing it all wrong.
Assuming I know what’s best for someone else means I am out of my own business. And, trust me, keeping my nose squarely in my own business is a full time job. Interestingly, it always seems easier to focus on other people’s shortcomings than it is to deal with my own shit. I feel so much smarter when I know exactly the way someone else should live their life. If I simply focus on my own life, though, I remember that decision making and this-thing-called-life aren’t near as easy when approached genuinely and honestly. Focusing on my own life means I stay out of your business and stay in my own business. I trust that you are an expert on you and I stay unattached to the outcome of your life.
I talk to various people almost daily about the burdens they carry with them. I have days when I assume I know what’s best for them. Those are the days my pride sneaks into the driver’s seat when I’m not looking. When I get my ego out of the soup and put my pride back in check, that’s when I am the most use for my friends and loved ones.
How can I possibly help someone if I already assume I know what’s best for them?
Putting myself in another’s business means I’m out of my own business; and the results certainly won’t be pretty.
I have people close to me who are dealing with some real heavy stuff! Some of you know a few of the stories I know and you’re aware of just how heavy they are. I have heard many other stories of heavy stuff that most would never fathom. People carry burdens that are deeper, darker, heavier, and uglier than we could imagine.
What good does it possibly do to pass judgment on someone else?
It would seem easy to get down on the world with so much pain and heartache around every corner. Trust me; I get it. I understand why people get depressed, use drugs, become alcoholics, or escape to their favorite vice. It’s so much easier to cheer on your favorite team or yell at the politicians on TV that need to get a clue. Running away from the pain and resigning to the heaviness of life is completely understandable.
We are all afforded this one opportunity to make the best life possible. Why do we let our pride get in the way of having a great life? Why do we allow people to continue to hurt us time and time again without putting a stop to it?
What would it take for you to believe you are completely worthy of the best life possible?
Even though life can be difficult and ugly, it can be simply amazing and beautiful at the same time. When we can strip away all the negativity and stress of our day-to-day lives, we are able to see the absolute gift that is our lives.
Last week my beautiful niece, Lyla, was brought into the world. There is NOTHING more precious than the gift of life. Sometimes it takes looking into the face of an innocent newborn to remind our adult brains that life is nothing short of a miracle and a gift. When we start to view our life as a miracle, it’s amazing how fast our judgments and problems disappear.
People need people more than they need pride. I agree! Don’t you?
Peace my Friends!
Baby Lyla with big brother Jackson 🙂